Bumpy Start to the New Year? 4 ways you've been set up for disappointment...

It's a new year! Ahh... the excitement... the pressure... the disappointment...

I was leading a workshop on Saturday all about visioning our lives for 2019.  Part of the dialogue was about the ways the new year sets us up for disappointment. Most obvious are the resolutions we make and quickly break. But why does this happen? It occurs to me that there are 4 main flaws in the usual way of celebrating the New Year. I'd love to know what you think, and what you might add to this list. And, because I believe the new year can be a nourishing experience, I offer alternatives for each flaw...

1. The start of the year comes just as winter begins.
Winter is a season to hibernate. It's a time to cozy up, to reflect by the light of a warm fire, to honor and let go of the previous year.  You're just getting started with this internal time, yet you're asked to be in massive external action to improve your life.

Instead... what if you honored the winter season? You could certainly set intentions for the New Year, but take your time to feel into the pause, leaving ample time (and generous grace) before taking action.

2. Resolutions assume you are broken.
"New Year. New You"  This slogan gets me riled. It assumes that who you are is not right or enough. And if you're not able to reinvent yourself in January, you're a failure. (It's also used to sell you products that promise to "fix" you in some way.)

Instead... "New Year. New Level of Love"  This deepening love begins with love for self, forgiveness of past mistakes and wrongs, and appreciation for your continued growth.

Photo by Tonya Lewis Photography

Photo by Tonya Lewis Photography

3. Resolutions ask you to add to an already full life without support.
A New Years Resolution can feel a lot like this... "You already have a lot of responsibilities, and routines. Without letting any of them go, it's time to add in time at the gym, a new way of eating, and a new way of being!" The worst part? You're expected to accomplish this through will power (aka without support)!

Instead... winter is an ideal time to clear clutter in all it's forms: time, objects, and unreleased emotion. Imagine how it would feel to focus on creating space for what you want to experience next (rather than rushing in). And imagine feeling supported through this process. I believe this would make for a more a meaningful, positive New Year ritual.

4. New Year rituals miss the mark.
Like many holidays, the New Year celebration comes with a sense of obligation... you must stay up late, drink alcohol, and be a new person in the morning!

Instead... what if you welcomed the New Year with stillness, and reflection? What if you allowed the New Year ritual to be nourishing rather than obligatory, to feel inspired about growth (and look forward to more), rather taking on a punishment for being "broken"? 

Photo by Blue Russ at January 2019 workshop

Photo by Blue Russ at January 2019 workshop

If ongoing ritual that lifts you up, and connection with other inspired women is something you'd benefit from this year, there are just 3 spots left in "Life Your Purpose" - let 's hop on the phone to discover if this the right fithttp://blue-russ.genbook.com/
(Learn more about this 3 month experience that includes retreats here)

May your love grow,